In Brief: Pussy Riot

The upside here is that the media has to use the words "Pussy Riot" seriously and, when possible, with gravitas. Bring Brokaw in, he'll know what to do. 

The downside is a lot of other things that are more important than my juvenile glee in the face of grown-ups saying decidedly non-grown up things. But that's, of course, what Russia has wrought here: a non-grown up conviction of three members of a band with a non-grown up name over an offense that was actually grown up-neutral. 

This is one of those moments where I have to stop and give America credit for not being this shitty. Sure, if a musician says something unpopular, they'll have their albums burned and sponsorships lost until they offer a lazy, mumbled apology.  Even that's not necessary if you keep your offense firmly within the Fox News acceptability scale. Ted Nugent (a walking, drooling example of why we should be less sad when rock stars die young) made explicit, just-short-of-threatening remarks about murdering the sitting President and Secretary of State on separate occasions and experienced no real consequences, beyond a Secret Service investigation (which will tend to happen when you appear to threaten the Commander-in-Chief; commie fascists, amirite?). More recently, Megadeth frontman Dave Mustaine accused Obama of staging the recent shootings in Colorado and Wisconsin. What's happened to him? The Internet called him some names. And... that's been it.

Because even when something really stupid and borderline offensive happens (and offering a prayer for God to remove the chief executive would fall firmly within those parameters if it happened here), the government rarely gets its panties in a bunch. That's not necessarily because we the American people are so confident in our Constitutional institutions (the Tea Party, for example, has no faith in the founding fathers or their documents or any of the concepts that they profess to revere). It's because our institutions happen to be strong enough to take those kind of insubstantial punches. And just enough of us are aware of that fact that we don't feel the need to come down on a punk band for, well, being a punk band.

You'd think that a man with a judo background who can hunt big game would be at least as secure in himself.